The good news: yes, sex is just as good in your 60s and 70s as it is in your 20s and 30s. The bad news? As you get older and your body changes, the way you have sex may change a little bit. Your body might not be as equipped to handle certain positions, plus you might not have the endurance you had in your youth.
That said, sex is awesome at any age — you just have to figure out which positions work best for you and your partner. Here’s a breakdown of the best sex positions for any age, from your spry 20s to your more seasoned 60s.
When you’re in your 20s
When you’re in your 20s, you’re likely free of any joint pain that later comes with age. That means it’s time to get frisky, however you choose.
That said, you could be more susceptible to premature ejaculation, in which case you should avoid positions like missionary and doggy-style: “they’re most likely to cause premature ejaculation, due to deeper penetration and male-controlled thrusts,” says Katy Zvolerin, IASSCS, Clinical Sexologist and sex educator at Adam & Eve.
Try: woman on top.
If you do struggle with premature ejaculation, “woman on top, where the woman controls the speed and depth of penetration, can help delay orgasm,” Zvolerin says. (Plus, you can’t beat the view.)
Try this: standing cowgirl.
Your 20s is a time for trying out sex positions that you might not be able to do when you’re older. With this in mind, “take advantage of having the strength and stamina to lift your partner and have sex against the wall,” says Zvolerin. “Have her wrap her legs around you for support, and pick a place where she can rest her hands against a desk or a sturdy shelf,” she says.
An added bonus: if you have issues with finishing too early, standing cowgirl gives you a chance to slow down. “When you’re focused on supporting the two of you, your mind will be slightly distracted. This keeps premature ejaculation at bay,” she says.
When you’re in your 30s
In your 30s, you may be a little less spry than you once were, but there’s probably no real need to slow down.
“This is the best time to try all those positions that require flexibility and stamina,” says sex educator and sexuality couch Alicia Sinclair, ACS, WASC, creator of sex toys like the b-Vibe and LeWand, and The Cowgirl.
While you likely won’t be experiencing any real joint pain, but if you’ve been working out for a few years, you might experience some injuries, so take that into account when trying new positions.
Try this: adjusted doggy.
“When you’re working around an injury, a standing posture may work well,” says Dr. Jennifer Landa, an OB/GYN in Orlando, FL. Have your partner lean on a desk or countertop and enter her from behind for a variation on doggy-style.
When you’re in your 40s
“We’re often most comfortable in our bodies and with our partners once we reach our 40s,” says Sinclair, so it’s a great time to try positions that enhance the spiritual aspect of sex and create a deeper connection with your partner.
Plus, while you’re still probably getting strong erections at this age, it may take a bit longer to get hard, so you should spend more time on foreplay before working up to the main event, she adds.
You might also notice the first signs of joint issues: “as men get into their 40’s, athletic injuries and issues like sciatica and low back pain increase,” says Dr. Jennifer Landa, an OB/GYN in Orlando, FL.
Try this: 69
“Whether it’s part of foreplay or the main event, oral sex is a great way to get busy when you and your partner are turned on, but need more warm-up time,” says Sinclair.
Plus, because women are more likely to experience vaginal dryness in their 40s, your partner will benefit from the extra oral attention as well.
“You’ll both be wrapped up in being able to experience pleasure simultaneously, so needing extra time to get fully hard won’t seem like a chore,” she says.
Try this: seated face-to-face
This position is great because it alleviates pressure off the joints, especially for the partner on top.
“In this passionate position, the receiving partner sits in the other partner’s lap. The position gives great G-spot access, along with the ability to gaze into each other’s eyes and experiment with deep, passionate kisses,” says Sinclair.
If you want to modify slightly, sit on top of your partner’s legs, put your butt between them and slightly close your knees. “This gives a nice tight squeeze and requires a little less work for the partner on top,” she says.
When you’re in your 50s
Unfortunately, you’re more likely to start experiencing erectile dysfunction (ED) after age 50. In fact, a study from the University of Chicago found that one-third of men between the ages of 50 and 64 experience ED. So you’re not alone.
“A few of your favorite positions with modifications can keep you feeling the same desire from your younger years, with a few adjustments to help when things go unexpectedly soft,” says Sinclair.
In general, any position where the man is on top is ideal, “because gravity flows downward to help blood flow into the penis,” says Landa. Another tip: try morning sex, because that’s the time of day when erections are strongest.
Try this: tight missionary
“Adjust the classic man-on-top position by having your partner wrap her legs around your waist. This creates a tight squeeze that will help keep the penis from slipping out if you’re having trouble staying hard,” says Sinclair.
Try this: reverse cowgirl
Having your partner ride you while you lie down leaves most of the moving and bouncing to her. “This is a great position for those with high blood pressure, as the physical activity is minimal while you lay back, relax, and enjoy the ride,” says Sinclair.What’s more, it helps your penis out, too.
“Since the rest of your movement is minimal, your body can focus on sending blood flow to the penis, rather than [to] your arms when you’re propping yourself up in missionary,” Sinclair says.“Your partner will enjoy being in control, especially if she’s experiencing vaginal dryness, as she can control the pace and avoid unpleasant friction.”
Try this: wide-legged doggy
Kneel behind your partner while she’s on her hands and knees. Have her spread her legs wide, and keep your legs in between hers. This leaves room for you to interact with your hands if necessary, which can help you out if you start to get a bit soft.“If you lose your erection, try penetrating with a finger or two under your penis as a sort of splint. Or use one hand to stroke yourself while you keep stimulating her with the other,” says Sinclair.
If you’re prone to joint pain or arthritis, you can use a pillow to help prop you up. “Doggy style, with the addition of pillows or cushions for support, can help alleviate the stress on the knee and hip joints,” says Zvolerin.
When you’re in your 60s
This is a time when it’s super important to take it easy on your body. Comfortable positions that keep the pressure off your joints are key for people who experience back pain, arthritis, and other issues that can make it hard to move, says Sinclair.
In your 60s, you also might find it increasingly difficult to maintain an erection. “Something to consider is the ‘soft-entry’ technique,” a.k.a. entering your penis while it’s still flaccid, says Landa. “It’s also desirable to use lubrication to make this happen. Then the partners can move together in ways that are pleasurable.”
Try this: spooning
“Older men have more issues with body pain and decreased flexibility due to arthritis, and this makes the spooning position one that can be very doable,” says Landa.
By Isadora Baum