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Sex & Relationships

You Got Her Back To Your Place. Now What?


The perfect night of stay-in seduction requires some pre-planning on your part. You'll need scented candles, a few bottles of vino, sensual R&B tunes on your home stereo (think Drake or Prince), and don't forget an erotica novel or two to conveniently place on your coffee table. She won't realise it but you're activating her horny sensors the moment she steps into your bachelor's pad.

Stimulate Her With Essential Oils
A US research found that a woman’s ability to detect and distinguish between scents is  1,000 times better than yours. Her smell and emotions are both located in the same neural network in her brain – the limbic system, says the study. So, using aromatherapy oils to create a sensuous mood will press her right buttons, says Dr Martha Lee, clinical  sexologist and a Men’s Health advisory board member. “Essential oils such as clary sage, jasmine, neroli, rose and ylang ylang all have aphrodisiac properties,” she adds. Depending on your (or her) preference, they can be used to either calm or stimulate both the mind and body.
Ply Her With Wine
Women who drink between one and two glasses of wine a day have a higher sex drive  than those who drink less. The University of Florence in Italy conducted a study of 800 women aged 18 to 50. They found that women who drank red wine daily were the most sexually satisfied – and most easily aroused – compared to the less-frequent cork poppers and teetotallers. Despite age being generally associated with a decline in female libido,  the research also found that drinking to the health of her sex drive was just as effective in older women. Which makes a well-aired bottle a long-term strategy, not just a short-term tactic.
Put On A Slow Jam
Music can be a very powerful tool in relieving stress and preparing for romance, which in turn allows the both of you to express your sexuality through lovemaking, says Dr Lee.  Moreover, tests by McGill University in Canada found that how a woman’s brain reacts to music is similar to the exhilaration of winning a bet or jumping out of a plane. These catalyse physiological responses such as increased heart rate and “shivers down the spine”. Sound familiar?
To be arousing, your song choice should have a “single lead voice and involve romantic or sexual lyrics”, the research found. A study at Goldsmiths University in the UK found that it’s the lyrics, not the tempo of the tune, that’s paramount. Try conducting the sounds of love through a wall-mounted stereo to leave you more floor space on which to get creative.
Talk Dirty To Her
Having the right literary material on your coffee table will increase your chances of having her on it. According to a study published in the Journal Of Psychology And  Human Sexuality, both men and women experience the same levels of sexual arousal  when reading literary erotica. However, explicit portrayals of sexual activity evoke greater responsiveness in women than men.
Suggests Dr Lee: “Get an erotic novel. Or better yet, use the current female craze for blood-sucking vampire stories such as Twilight to your advantage – and read aloud the graphic and ‘juicy’ parts to her.” You may even encourage her to add in some role-playing to fan the flames of passion.


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